I worked a job once that I hated but that I was really good at. Ever had a job like that? It’s a very weird feeling to go to work each morning and feel it will instantly bore you, and then get a compliment for it.
In this particular job, I had developed a plan my boss really loved. So much so that he told me, “Hey, you’re really good at this stuff.” I’m sure I smirked my best smirk. Not strategic, but hey, I was in my 20s and my “filter” was far from developed. Might still be.
After I gave him that look, he pensively and disappointedly said, “You know, I honestly can’t tell if your glass is half-empty or half-full.”
Our meeting was over, and I shuffled out to my office, silently bawling my eyes out. He’d called my bluff.
Maybe it’s turning 50 (aren’t you going to welcome me to AARP?) or maybe it’s having gone through some humbling experiences in the last few years, but I really think I spent much of my earlier years dwelling on what I didn’t have, rather than on what I did have.
Today, I don’t have the fast-paced career or the bigger paycheck or the jam-packed inbox (I don’t mind this one at all), and I’m not in the middle of all the action like I used to be. Well, not at work, anyway.
But you know what I am in the middle of? I’m in the middle of my own life for a change. I have a sense of calm and peace and availability for relationships that I didn’t have when I was in the rat race. I have time for my family, especially in a pinch. I just took a trip with my mom and husband that would have seemed logistically near impossible before. Heck, before, I’d never have dreamed of taking a vacation at all.
I just wish I’d spent more time in my earlier years valuing what I had, rather than what I didn’t have. I feel like the trip we just took opened my eyes to that, giving me a new perspective on how precious life and relationships are.
I’m figuring out how I’ll recap this treasure hunt of a trip we just took, but I can give you a hint about what I’ll be writing about soon: Let’s just say I’m finally getting to know Braulio.
6 thoughts on “Have/have-not, all rolled up into one”
Ahh, Braulio,what an elusive character he has been for you!! Glad you are finally coming to grips with him – ha,ha, Really enjoy your blog!
Tia, isn’t that true?! I wish I could visit you and go over what I’ve found (and not found). It’s a near-lifelong mystery so far!
Ahhhhh yes good thing we gain wisdom as we get older 🙂 At least I hope I do. Haha. As they say youth is wasted on the youth. Lol. But seriously you never struck me as a glass is half empty type personality at all.
I think we all mellow out and grow as we get older. Speaking of careers and work ~ Too bad I can’t go back with what I know now !! Arg. Wish I had had a big ol cup of wisdom and thoughtfulness in my 20s 😜💩😊
Don’t we all!
So happy to hear you are solving this!
Not sure I’d call it solving yet, but getting closer – and well, that’s progress, right?